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  1. #1
    Silver Lounger
    Join Date
    Jan 2001
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    Swanzey, New Hampshire, USA
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    How to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

    1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with your sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
    2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice!
    3. Everytime someone asks you to do something, ask, "Do you want french fries with that?".
    4. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to Espresso..
    5. In the Memo field of all the checks you write, put "For Marijuana."
    6. Skip down the hall rather than walk and see how many looks you get.
    7. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
    8. Specify that your drive-through order is "To Go".
    9. Sing along at the Opera.
    10. Five days in advance, inform Your friends you can't attend their party because you have a headache.
    11. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won!"
    12. When leaving the zoo, start running toward the parking lot yelling "Run! Run for your lives! They're loose!"
    13. Tell your children over dinner, "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
    Jeff
    simul iustus et peccator

  2. #2
    Plutonium Lounger
    Join Date
    Oct 2001
    Location
    Lexington, Kentucky, USA
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    I love the one about the hair dryer. I wish I had a hair dryer - I might give it a try...

    However, I'd bet that #12 would get you arrested PDQ...


  3. #3
    Super Moderator
    Join Date
    Dec 2000
    Location
    Renton, Washington, USA
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    But, AL, don't you need to blow dry the hair on the face?

    Now running HP Pavilion a6528p, with Win7 64 Bit OS.

  4. #4
    3 Star Lounger
    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Location
    Minneapolis, Minnesota, USA
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    I confess I sort of did #12 at a zoo once and no one was less amused than he-who-shall-not-be-named. Garbette thought it was funny.
    Carpy Diem, it's .

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