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Thread: Bad Recipes

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    Super Moderator WebGenii's Avatar
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    Bad Recipes

    Okay, we are all looking for good recipes in this forum, but what about really bad ones?
    What I mean is the kind of recipe, that you look at, and figure some terrible mistake was made in ingredients, amounts or whatever. The story of you serving it to your visitors is a plus.
    I'll lead off:
    For many years, my mother collected all sorts of recipes and being a child of the depression if she found a deal on food, she couldn't resist it. These two tendencies collided and created one of the worst meals I've ever had (to be fair, my mother is an excellent cook - the recipe lead her astray). The story begins when for whatever reason - she got a great deal on bananas. We had all the classics; banana muffins, banana loaf, banana milk shakes etc. Then she turned to her recipe stash and found ... <font color=448800><font face="EraserDust">Banana Meat Loaf</font face=dust></font color=448800>. It turned the meat loaf green, and the taste was .... <img src=/S/barf.gif border=0 alt=barf width=64 height=23>. Fortunately, my father rebelled and we all avoided eating it. But it put us all off the rest of the banana baked goods in the freezer for months.
    I still think the recipe had to be some sort of sick joke ...
    [b]Catharine Richardson (WebGenii)
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    Re: Bad Recipes

    When your father rebelled, did your Mom go <img src=/S/bananas.gif border=0 alt=bananas width=33 height=35>?
    -Mark

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    Re: Bad Recipes

    By some weird coincidence, the banana animation appears to be synchronized with the Billy Idol ("White Wedding") song that I'm playing on my computer. My latest internet radio station discovery http://www.jackfm.ca/eprise/main/jack/cindex.html.

    Rock on!
    [b]Catharine Richardson (WebGenii)
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    Re: Bad Recipes

    Wow, I just had to check to see if what you were saying applied to what I was listening to and Mr. Banana grooves pretty well with that, too....

    Thanks for sharing the station. <img src=/S/smile.gif border=0 alt=smile width=15 height=15>
    -Mark

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    Re: Bad Recipes

    My whole family has a cookbook we have dubbed "The Green Book" (insert angelic singing here... ahhhhhhh) The book was created by Deborah Hospital in southern NJ (the best heart hospital around) for a fund raiser YEARS ago. They compiled recipes from staff, volunteers and patients by way of a cooking competition. Only the best recipes can be found in it. (It's no longer published <img src=/S/weep.gif border=0 alt=weep width=21 height=16> so I've taken to photo copying my mother's) My grandmother was a volunteer there and gave the books out as Christmas gifts to all her children a long, long time ago. This book has reached mythic proportions in my family... when Thanksgiving rolls around any recipe that is new and decidedly yummy has always come from a recipe found in "The Green Book" (ahhhhhh)

    One night, my mom unveiled for our family a new dinner she found... we all dug in and promptly made the "Eh, is this a joke?" face, and spit it out. We ordered pizza that night. My mom couldn't understand it... it was from "The Green Book" (aaaahhh?) She decided that she must not have followed the directions correctly, so she tried it again a few nights later. This time my dad, brothers and I were far more cautious. If Jimmy didn't like it... the rest of us weren't going to touch it... and so, we had pizza again.
    Just to be sure (and to put my mother's cooking ego at ease) she called her sister to make the same thing for her family (we go by the "ewww, this it gross... taste it" philosophy) My aunt called us up the next night and told us of her family's pizza night.

    We were all ready with our pitch forks to burn the page the recipe was on, but found that the other side contained the page with our traditional Christmas breakfast on it. So out came the black marker, and we crossed off the whole page. To this day, there is only ONE big black X in "The Green Book" (aaahhh). <img src=/S/smile.gif border=0 alt=smile width=15 height=15>
    have fun
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    Re: Bad Recipes

    Hmmm sedated bananas ... there's a joke in there somewhere. Or maybe its just because I'm sitting next to a laboratory trying not to sing the lyrics out loud.

    Arrgh, now I'll have tune cooties the rest of the day!

    <img src=/w3timages/orangeline.gif width=33% height=2>
    tune cooties: when a tune gets "stuck" in your head and you can't get rid of it except by infecting yourself with a different tune.

    Cheers
    [b]Catharine Richardson (WebGenii)
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    Re: Bad Recipes

    I'm sure you've all seen these or some variation thereof--When my son was in kindergarten, all the students were charged with planning Thanksgiving Dinner. His I keep a copy of in my desk drawer, and when I need a good laugh (or to remember how sweet and cute he was 8 years ago) I take it out and read it. Keep in mind, I've never actually tried this, but to any who are brave enough to attempt it, <img src=/S/salute.gif border=0 alt=salute width=15 height=20> :

    Go to your Grandma's house with a 74 lb turkey
    7 lbs butter
    1 ball of stuffing

    Heat oven to 46 degrees for 4 minutes
    Rub the butter on the turkey, put it in the pan
    Put stuffing in the turkey butt and the rest of the butter
    Bake for 15 minutes
    Pour the butter and stuffing out of the turkey on your plate
    Have your Dad cut it up
    Eat Pumpkin Pie <img src=/S/munch.gif border=0 alt=munch width=19 height=17>

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    Re: Bad Recipes

    <img src=/S/rofl.gif border=0 alt=rofl width=15 height=15>

    I've got to get me some more of those kids' recipes! Thank you for sharing that one.

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    Re: Bad Recipes

    As a brand new cook several years ago, I decided to try making a blue berry pie and found a recipe in a cook book that looked simple. Made the crust just fine and then instead of using fresh blue berries, I went for the canned pie filling. That is where I should have stopped! But no, I continued to follow the recipe by adding the sugar, flour, salt, etc - following it faithfully to the end. My hubby was pleased to see a favorite fruit in pie form that evening and dived right in!! And spit it right back out! <img src=/S/sad.gif border=0 alt=sad width=15 height=15> The recipe had called for 1/4 C. salt instead of 1/4 tsp. salt and I did exactly as it said!! I took a lot of teasing about that over the years and I sure do know better now!! <img src=/S/yep.gif border=0 alt=yep width=15 height=15> <img src=/S/grin.gif border=0 alt=grin width=15 height=15>


    "Peace begins with a smile. "-- Mother Teresa

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    Re: Bad Recipes

    > Okay, we are all looking for good recipes in this forum, but what about really bad ones?

    You want my Curried Strawberries?

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    Re: Bad Recipes

    Do tell
    [b]Catharine Richardson (WebGenii)
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    Re: Bad Recipes

    It's quite a simple recipe.

    Take 1 lb ripe strawberries, place in an open glassware container. Sprinkle about one teaspoon of curry powder over the strawberries every hour for six hours, to let the curry seep into the berries. After six hours throw away the disgusting mixture and buy a 4-litre tup of butterscoth ripple ice-cream instead.

    Truth is, in the early seventies a British newspaper or magazine ran a contest for the WORST imaginable recipes using the MOST TASTY ingredients. The published a complete meal./menu from the entries.. The only one I remember was curried (good) strawberries (good) combined (bad).

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    Re: Bad Recipes

    When I was in grad school in Austin, Texas, there was an annual event there (which I HOPE is still going) called Spam-a-rama. It featured a contest for dishes made from Spam. I never got the recipe (oh, I wish I had) for one dish that placed pretty high one year, which was Spamoni ice cream. I just can't imagine...

    Lee Morgan

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    Re: Bad Recipes

    > Spamoni ice cream. I just can't imagine...

    The glace cherries would've put me off .........

  15. #15
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    Re: Bad Recipes

    I am curious to know what the recipe was? Please? :-)
    My husband used to be a public school teacher. One day he was standing in line at the cafeteria and a friend (always joking) said "Don't eat the meatballs--they are stuffed with peanut butter." Hubby got the meatballs and they WERE stuffed with peanut butter. They had fish topped with peanut butter, peanut-butter stuffed celery, peanut butter cookies (now THOSE are wonderful), etc. Do you think it had anything to do with the fact that it was the administration of President Carter???

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