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Home>Windows Update finds no updates, but it's only a matter of time

Windows Secrets Newsletter • Issue 7 • 2003-06-05 • Circulation: over 400,000


Table of contents 
  • Top Story: Windows Update finds no updates, but it’s only a matter of time
  • Patch Watch: Microsoft officially corrects the XP patch slowdown problem
  • Best Freeware: Monitor your servers (or any IP address)
  • Wacky Web Week: You’ve gotta give ‘em credit for this one

 
Top Story

Windows Update finds no updates, but it’s only a matter of time

By Brian Livingston

Reader Jeremy Rosenblatt blows the whistle on a situation in which Microsoft’s widely used Windows Update routine finds no updates to install – even when there are clearly many patches needed by a machine.

“The behavior would not cause a typical user to suspect a problem,” Rosenblatt writes, “as Microsoft provides no hint that an error has occurred.” I’ll let him tell the rest of the story:

  • “The cause of the issue is that if a machine has its date set to something outside of the valid range of the SSL certificate on MS’s WinUpdate site, WinUpdate will get an SSL error. Instead of reporting it in some intelligible manner, WinUpdate simply reports, ‘There are no updates available for your computer. Please check back later’ (with no error message at all).

    “Only if you then click on the ‘See Also/Windows Update Catalog’ do you get a clue that there might be an error involved. And even then it isn’t obvious what’s going on. You get an error page, but the only troubleshooting tip is a mailto tag that formats an e-mail to MS with ‘ERROR 0x800A138F’ in the subject line.

    “It’s easy to try for yourself. Just change your machine’s date to 2001, open a fresh instance of IE and go to Windows Update.

    “It should also occur if you use the WinUpdate Start menu icon, although there’s some possibility you may need to reboot after the date change.”

This scenario would most likely occur when someone was setting up a PC for the first time and its internal clock hadn’t yet been configured. But it can also happen to many longtime users who aren’t too fastidious about their computer’s date and time settings.

After Rosenblatt wrote in about this, the problem was quickly added to the WinUpdate troubleshooting page. But since a clear error message is never displayed to affected users, they might go quite a long time without critical updates – and never think to look for a troubleshooting note.

So watch those system clocks. The time may be later than you think.

To send me more information about this, or to send me a tip on any other subject, visit WindowsSecrets.com/contact.

 
Patch Watch

Microsoft officially corrects the XP patch slowdown problem

I wrote in the May 8 issue of Brian’s Buzz that Windows XP with Service Pack 1 suffers heavy performance problems after you install a patch Microsoft released on April 16. (This patch is known as MS03-013.)

Microsoft officially acknowledged this and subsequently revised its security bulletin on May 28 to announce a new patch. The new update “corrects the performance issues that some customers experienced,” the company says.

The new bulletin advises that companies may not want to install MS03-013 unless they are having the specific problem that needs to be patched. The security weakness allows an intruder to gain administrator privileges, but he or she would have to enjoy physical access to a machine to achieve this. I’d agree that the patch may not be necessary for most companies. More info Other significant bulletins:

  • Microsoft releases critical MS03-020 security patch for IE 5 and 6
  • Security expert Thor Larholm says there are 15 significant security holes in Internet Explorer that still have not been corrected by Microsoft
  • Official response to a virus that claims to be from support@microsoft.com (See the May 8 issue of Brian’s Buzz.)



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Best Freeware

Monitor your servers (or any IP address)

How quickly would you know one of your servers had died? FREEping 2.0 is a new version of a free utility released last month that will ping your Windows 2003, 2000, or NT 4 SP3 servers – or any IP address in the world, for that matter. You define the testing interval, and FREEping (which otherwise runs silently in the background) sends you a pop-up message when a machine stops responding. Available from Advanced Toolware. More info

InnerReg controls startup programs for you
Developer Naram Cheez has released InnerReg 1.0, a free utility that manages any programs that start automatically when you run Windows. His tool lets you control each of the six stages of the startup process, including programs that are launched by lines in the Registry rather than the Startup folder. More info



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Wacky Web Week

You’ve gotta give ‘em credit for this one

The crazy guys at ZUG (which bills itself as “the world’s only comedy site”) have pulled off a major prank, proving that no one at retail stores even bothers to check that the signature on a charge slip actually matches the one on the back of the credit card. John Hargrave, who remarks that his normal signature looks like it was written by “an unusually talented chicken,” signed his charge slips as Shakespeare, Jesus, Porky Pig (at Disneyland), etc., and no one batted an eye. He says he’s thinking of legally changing his name to “I Stole This Card.” But I’ll stop right there because you really have to read this hilarious tale for yourself. The Credit Card Prank


YOUR SUBSCRIPTION

The Windows Secrets Newsletter is published weekly on the 1st through 4th Thursdays of each month, plus occasional news updates. We skip an issue on the 5th Thursday of any month, the week of Thanksgiving, and the last two weeks of August and December. Windows Secrets is a continuation of four merged publications: Brian's Buzz on Windows and Woody's Windows Watch in 2004, the LangaList in 2006, and the Support Alert Newsletter in 2008.

Publisher: WindowsSecrets.com, 1218 Third Ave., Suite 1515, Seattle, WA 98101 USA. Vendors, please send no unsolicited packages to this address (readers' letters are fine).

Editor in chief: Tracey Capen. Senior editors: Fred Langa, Woody Leonhard. Copyeditor: Roberta Scholz. Program director: Tony Johnston. Contributing editors: Yardena Arar, Susan Bradley, Scott Dunn, Michael Lasky, Scott Mace, Ryan Russell, Lincoln Spector, Robert Vamosi, Becky Waring. Product manager: Andy Boyd. Advertising director: Eric Gilley.

Trademarks: Microsoft and Windows are registered trademarks of Microsoft Corporation. The Windows Secrets series of books is published by Wiley Publishing Inc. The Windows Secrets Newsletter, WindowsSecrets.com, Support Alert, LangaList, LangaList Plus, WinFind, Security Baseline, Patch Watch, Perimeter Scan, Wacky Web Week, the Logo Design (W, S or road, and Star), and the slogan Everything Microsoft Forgot to Mention all are trademarks and service marks of WindowsSecrets.com. All other marks are the trademarks or service marks of their respective owners.

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Copyright © 2012 by WindowsSecrets.com. All rights reserved.

Table of contents

Top-scoring articles in the past 12 months
  • Leaving long cookie trails throughout the Web 5.00
  • Windows-like security for Android devices 5.00
  • Win7′s no-reformat, nondestructive reinstall 4.56
  • LizaMoon infection: a blow-by-blow account 4.46
  • RPV: Win7′s least-known data-protection system 4.35
  • Recovery: the last step in total data security 4.31
  • The sorry tale of the (un)Secure Sockets Layer 4.30
  • Time for a .NET update we can’t ignore 4.30
  • Getting the most from Windows Search — Part 1 4.25
  • Revising printing habits saves money and trees 4.25
  • Upgrades end in erratic, partial hangs 4.25
  • Get wired performance from your Wi-Fi network 4.24
  • Caution: Bumps in the road to IPv6 4.23
  • Patch Watch adds problem-patch update chart 4.23
  • ZeuS Trojan reinvents itself as bots rock on 4.22
  • Pros and cons of a ‘keyfile’ password 4.21
  • April brings showers of browser patches 4.20
  • Readers comment on the LizaMoon infection story 4.20
  • Office 2007 gets its final service pack 4.19
  • The advanced system-recover toolkit 4.18
  • Putting Registry-/system-cleanup apps to the test 4.18
  • One year and 99 security bulletins later 4.18
  • Don’t pay for software you don’t need — Part 3 4.17
  • What to do when Windows refuses to boot 4.17
  • Make the most of Windows 7′s Libraries 4.16
  • Keeping you up to date: say no to .NET — again 4.16
  • Internet Explorer gets another round of patches 4.15
  • Vacation’s over; it’s a big round of patches 4.15
  • Big-time Wi-Fi security for the small office 4.14
  • Office File Validation patch leads to problems 4.14
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Trademarks: Microsoft and Windows are registered trademarks of Microsoft Corporation. The Windows Secrets series of books is published by Wiley Publishing Inc. The Windows Secrets Newsletter, WindowsSecrets.com, WinFind, Windows Gizmos, Security Baseline, Patch Watch, Perimeter Scan, Wacky Web Week, the Logo Design (W, S or road, and Star), and the slogan Everything Microsoft Forgot to Mention all are trademarks and service marks of iNET Interactive. All other marks are the trademarks or service marks of their respective owners.
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